While surfing online on the lookout for personals sites that are worth looking into for casual dating, you’ll often cross scam sites that promise every user perfectly willing women, despite the fact that there are usually more registeres men than women. This, along with exaggerated stories that float around, promotes the idea that you can do nothing wrong when you’re dating casually. As soon as you try that out for yourself however, you’ll find yourself sorely disappointed. Women aren’t falling over themselves to set up a date with you, it’s more commonly the other way around. You can’t just sit back and write a message to any registered female user, telling them to come over tomorrow. Casual dating can be work too.
But on the other hand, it can be immensely rewarding and simple. It’s all just a question of how you approach it. You can go in blind and learn your own hard lessons, maybe even quitting out of frustration due to your lack of success. Or you can simply take a look at the following set of three rules of casual dating to ease your way.
It’s a Mutual Agreement
Although the personals scam sites online will constantly try to convince users that the registered women are practically like escorts who don’t require payment, that’s far from the truth. Of course, occasionally you’ll find one or two women who don’t care much for pretense and will cut straight to the chase. But more often than not you’ll find yourself trying to advertise yourself as a charismatic and good lover to a female user. You need her agreement to move on to the next step in casual dating. Even when you’re already on a date with her, that doesn’t automatically mean that you’re guaranteed to have sex in the next few hours. Essentially, it’s pretty much like a normal date, just without you needing to prove that you’d be a great choice on the long run. In casual dating, you just need to prove that you’re a great choice for the night.
This doesn’t mean that you should boast about your previous dates and conquests, or how you can make a woman scream herself hoarse. This will only make her roll her eyes – not in a good way, mind you – and start ignoring your messages. What she’ll appreciate far more than your abilities in bed and any compliments you make her, is how you treat her. As soon as you show that you understand and respect the fact that she has a choice to say yes or no to you, she’ll start feeling that she can trust you. Trust is important for casual dating. After all, she’s not only trusting you to give her pleasure, she’s also trusting you to treat her well and not to cause her harm.
You Cannot Make Demands
As you know, in every relationship you can ask for something and it’s quite likely that you’ll receive a positive reaction due to the relationship dynamics. Your partner knows that in turn, at some point they can ask you for something and they’ll get a positive reaction. In a casual dating situation, there usually is a set timeframe in which such an exchange of favors needs to happen, if it does. This is why the least dates will agree to any demands you may make, beyond sexual acts, that is. In casual dating, it’s all a bit more egoistical. You want to have your itch scratched and as it happens, so does she. If you want to get technical, you’re using each other for your own benefits. If her benefit isn’t as great or greater than yours, the deal is off.
For example: You can’t expect her to drive across the entire country to visit you in Victoria, just because you happened to start a good message conversation with her prior to knowing where she lives and you’d like to meet with her. She’ll weigh her options, but it’s hardly likely that she’ll come to the conclusion that you’re investing just as much as she is for your mutual benefit, so that the trip will be worth taking. So if you want to ask her to do something special and specific, be sure that you’re doing something that is equal in time, money or anything of similar worth invested. Essentially, make the deal worth it for her.
Respect (Each Other’s) Privacy
As pointed out previously, setting up a casual date with someone takes a bit of a leap of faith on both sides when it comes to trust. You’re meeting with an almost complete stranger to have sex and in most cases, to never see each other again after that. You don’t know if she’s telling the truth when she says she works for a bank, nor does she when you say you’re married and therefore a hotel would be a better meeting place for the two of you. It’s also none of either of your businesses, really. Maybe you aren’t married and just don’t want to clean up your apartment. That’s absolutely fine. The only thing you should be aware about each other is potential sexual diseases (and even then you should still use protection), kinks and turn-offs. Anything beyond that would get you far more involved in each other’s lives than a casual dating arrangement implies.
This means, even when you’re invited into the privacy of her home, you shouldn’t go further than taking a look around and asking where the toilet is – assuming that you aren’t distracted by foreplay, anyway. But even a step earlier, when you’re still in the getting to know each other with messages stage online, you have no obligation to go into details of your private life and nor does she. This is how the no strings attached part of casual datings stays the way it is. So, even if you’re curious, don’t ask too personal questions that aren’t relevant to meeting each other or having sex. Should either or both of you freely volunteer any private information or reply in more detail to a question, then it’s your own choice to make. In turn, both of you have the right to turn down a question about something you’d rather not talk about.
In the end, it all comes down to one thing: Knowing that the woman you’re trying to date casually is just as much as a person as you are. She too tries to avoid getting scammed online on personals sites and she too wants to be treated with respect. It’s sensible, that’s why you want the same.The moment you don’t give her the same as you yourself want, you’ll find yourself without a date. If this situation arises and you are left without a date, you can always look for legit personals at onlinepersonalsreviews.ca. Read the online personals site reviews to make your decision.
However, it’s also important that these points aren’t just to the advantage of women. They count just as much for you. So in turn, should your potential date ask you to do things that aren’t worth it for you on the long run, don’t sell yourself short. Although you’ll most likely miss out on the sex, you shouldn’t need to go on a day trip for it. Then you might as well invest your money in an escort instead.